Abuse is sadly an element of many people’s stays in nursing homes, and it can take many different forms. One that might not be at the top of most people’s radar is cultural or identity abuse. This can be just as damaging as other forms of abuse, such as financial and physical. It could be carried out by staff, fellow residents or both.
Here are a few examples of what it might look like.
Failing to cater to cultural or religious dietary needs
Your aunt is Muslim and does not eat pork products. When you visit, you notice she has lost weight. It turns out that several of the meals have been based around pork, with no alternatives offered. This, despite you repeatedly making her dietary needs clear to the staff. You begin to suspect the chef is doing it on purpose because he has a prejudice against Muslims.
Threatening to expose someone’s secrets
You’ve always believed your dad was gay, even though he was happily married to your mom for decades. You’ve never raised the matter, and neither has he or your mom. Then one day, he tells you in floods of tears. You suspect it was not voluntary, and on probing further, discover that he only did so because one of the carers found out and was threatening to tell everyone, from the other residents to the grandkids.
Isolating someone through language
Your relative tells you that they are having trouble integrating at the nursing home because some of the staff and residents constantly switch to a different language in front of them. Your relative has no issue with people speaking other languages, as they themselves speak more than one. But they feel the switch is being made intentionally to exclude them due to historic conflicts between their country of origin and that of the people doing it.
Nursing home residents who are subjected to abuse of any form may not be able to do much about it themselves. Family members may need to step in and push for solutions, which in some cases may involve legal action.